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I’m ill again. It doesn’t surprise me. Deja vu. I had to catch the bus from outside school, after persuading my teachers that I was going to a doctors appointment and not just skipping lessons. I have been waiting on these hard back plastic seats for nearly an hour just for one other doctor in this world to give me some antibiotics and send on my way home. This time I have come to the hospital because Mum thinks the infections getting serious, I cant notice the difference though. The hospital is a lot different from the doctors in town. I suppose its bound to be though.

On the wall in front of me there is a big clock, and every minute I sit here it seems to go slower and slower. There are Doctors rushing everywhere. I don’t really think I want to be a doctor. You have to be good at science. I’m not. A man has just walked in through the automatic sliding doors, which allow an artic wind to run right through my body. He is wearing big black boots with a headscarf tied loosely around the big matt of curly hair left messily on his head. Pulled tightly over his big fat stomach is a t-shirt saying Greenpeace on it. His trousers are black and come to just above his ankle.

He reminds me a lot like the man that used to own the music shop in town. A young boy follows him. I think it must be his son as he too has curly hair and is wearing a similar t-shirt saying Greenpeace. He doesn’t look at all happy. His arms are tightly folded and you can see he has been crying. I bet his Mums expecting a baby and he doesn’t want it to be a girl. Yes I am right, they have just made their way towards the labour ward. They’ll be waiting a long time in there. Every so often a policeman will walk past. They all look so bored, like me.

I used to want to be a police lady, but not anymore. Not since there was a report on telly about the policewoman who had been stabbed by two burglars. There’s an old lady sitting on the end of my rows of seats. I think she should really be in an old peoples home. She is wearing a lilac cardigan with plastic pearl buttons. Her shoes are a navy blue with a bar going across the front. Her skirt is long enough to just cover her knees and looks like one of those straw bags that carry potatoes. Her hands are small and wrinkly and her hair is so thin and white it almost looks clear.

I guess she might have actually be quite pretty when she was my age, but now because she is so old her shoulders are all hunched over which makes her head drop and so I cannot clearly make out her face. I really don’t think she should be in a hospital it is no place for her. Maybe she is waiting for someone though. Oh dear, she might have just lost a relative. I remember when grandma died. Waiting around her bed was awful. Dad and grandpa looked so upset. I can picture their faces now. I was only young, but I will always remember her blue-rimmed spectacles.

Its 4:37 and 23 seconds, gosh I am bored. I really should get up and give my legs a stretch, but that’s really too much effort. There are a group of children standing outside the entrance. I can’t imagine what they are doing out there. There are plenty of seats in here. I think I will count the seats just to see if all the children could fit in here. 1,2,3,4,5……… 76 spare seats. So why are they standing out side. I think I will go and have a look.

The receptionist is giving me a funny look. “What’s going outside? ” I might as well ask. No point in going outside for nothing. It’s a school trip. Cross Ash primary school, come to learn about life working in a hospital, their bus is late I think it broke down. ” “Is that it, oh well if that’s it I’ll go and sit back down”. Great I thought that might be something interesting. Oh well. Now some fat person has taken my warm seat, he could have had any other seat but he took mine. This seat is all cold, but it will warm up soon. I’m so hungry, but I really can’t go anywhere, just in case my doctor comes. I know where the canteen is, it’s just down the corridor on the left.

I had to come here once before when grandma was ill. I really shouldn’t go. There is a man sitting two spaces away from me, he is sleeping. He’s been here longer than I have, hasn’t moved either. There is a newspaper folded neatly on his lap. It’s the Financial Times. He must be a businessman. There is a half-cup of coffee next to his feet. His brief case is brown and looks very old. I hope he’s all right. His face is very pale, but he has probably had a very hectic night. There is a female doctor making her way towards us. She has just knelt down beside him.

Excuse me Mr Lowdon? ” He isn’t waking, “Excuse me? ” She is shaking him on the shoulder. “Mr Lowdon can you please wake? ” His head is lifting, both eyes are open. Suddenly he is wide-awake. He has just stood up. She stands up with him. “Can you follow me please? ” She is looking very anxious as they walk away I can see tears forming in the doctors eyes. He keeps asking questions. “How is she? ” he is asking. “Please tell me she is alright, what about the baby, is the baby alright too? ” She has led him into a little room not far from where I am sitting.

Something must be very wrong, But what. She hasn’t shut the door properly. I know I mustn’t listen but I cant help it. I listen carefully to what she has to say. “I am sorry Mr Lowdon, your wife didn’t make it. She died while giving birth, the baby survived. ” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I knew I shouldn’t have been listening but I couldn’t help it. “No, please tell me no. She is all I have, no, no”. I hear him beginning to cry. “Where is she? I want to see her now,” I can hear the upset in his voice, but he also sounds angry and impatient. “I will take you to her now.

The baby has been taken to ward 4, it’s a baby girl, she is in safe hands,” explains the female doctor. As he comes out of the room I can see tears trickling down his face. He face is scarlet red and his hands area shaking violently. As they walk off the female doctor carefully folds her arm around his shoulder. Then he stops, and breaks down in tears. I cannot watch, I must move, there is a seat over near the entrance I will go and sit there. That had to be the saddest thing I had ever heard. I wish I hadn’t listened. I want to cry for him, and yet I don’t know him. I must forget about it.

Its 5:05, I really cant think where my mum is is. There must be some bad traffic. I am beginning to get tired. I think I will go and find the canteen and buy some chocolate. Lets see, I remember it being down here. There it is. I think I will get a Marble. They remind me of Gillian chocolates. The girl at the till is very young. She doesn’t look much older than me, but she is wearing so much makeup. Her eyeliner is very think and her lipstick has practically rubbed off. She isn’t smiling. I don’t blame her really, she has probably been working here for a very long time.

Mmmmm that was nice. I had better make my way back towards the seats, just in case the doctor arrives or my Mum, maybe. I think I am just going to have a look outside to see if Mum has arrived. It’s really cold out here. It went dark at about 4:30pm. Mum was meant to be here almost 1 and a half hours ago. She works in Cardiff so to get up to Abergavenny at 4:00 on a Friday afternoon must be pretty hard. Oh that looks like the car. Yes it is. “Mum, hello Mum” I feel like a fool waving my hands in the air. Oh well. She is pulling up beside me.

For a Mum I think she is quite a fast driver, that’s what makes her cool. “Sorry dear the traffic was terrible, and there was an accident, have you seen the doctor yet? ” She is mumbling, she talks so fast. “No I haven’t seen the doctor, are you sure my appointment is today? ” This is when I find out that I was meant to be here last Friday! “Yes its today, I think, hold on I will just check my diary,” Mum has one of those very small diaries. I am surprised she can fit her ‘busy schedule’ into it.

“Ah no sorry dear, its not today, that’s funny, when is it then? “Oh Mum, I have been here for the last 2 hours” this is typical of mum I bet she hasn’t even booked an appointment now. “Well I haven’t written it in, I will just have to book you another one”. So I just get into the car. I mean there is no point in going in now. “Can we go for a MacDonalds? As I have been waiting in there for so long”. Mum is totally against any kind of junk food but I really think I deserve one now, don’t you? “Yes of course, I am sorry about that, I was sure I had booked an appointment, oh well apart from that, how was your day? “

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