The assassin

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Tick tock, tick tock. Time sure goes slowly when you’re waiting. Waiting for what do you ask? I don’t even know yet, maybe I shouldn’t tell you; maybe I should just keep it to myself. That’s just what I have been doing for the past year. Waiting. Slowly. Preparing for this moment, like a world-class chef prepares for an exquisite meal for the queen, you know, so carefully, elegantly, making sure there isn’t the slightest mistake. That’s just what I have been doing, preparing. Well the wait is almost over. Today it ends. In just a few hours or so I’m going to do it, I’m going to do what I want to do.

Am I scared? Of course I’m scared but I mustn’t let fear disturb my concentration, otherwise there will be no point of me being here. I feel the sweat dripping from my forehead to my lips, the taste is salty and makes me a bit sick. What am I doing here? Waiting. Still waiting. The waiting is unbearable but as they say, the end justifies the means. Where am I? Well I’m feeling a bit dizzy so that must mean that I’m a bit high up, not so high as to touch the sky, just six storeys I think. I’m sitting or lying down, I don’t know. I’ve been waiting up here for so long it hurts.

I have nearly forgotten why exactly I am here until I catch a glimpse of it. It’s just lying there with me, next to me, almost touching me. It makes me feel so dirty but its there for a reason; it is the greatest part of my plan. When the time comes I will have to touch it but only when the time comes, not now. I quickly glance away from it. I never really had seen one before yesterday. Only ever seen them in the movies, I never knew that they felt so cold, that they looked so black and that they were so big. I’m not really a bad person.

This does not make me a bad person; at least I don’t think so. I’m just doing what needs to be done; I’m doing everyone a huge favour by getting rid of the garbage. Am I? I’m confused. Lots of emotions are overcrowding me. Hurtful emotions, harmful ones tears fall from my eyes, I don’t know why, they just do. I’m thinking it through. Everything. The plan. the reason of me being here. More tears fall. I have finally convinced myself that this is the right thing to do. More tears and my eyes water, I should take this balaclava off but I must not risk anyone seeing me. Hate.

That’s another emotion. That’s one thing that I must focus on now. Hate is my only friend and this thing that they call love is my enemy, not real. Hate will help me through this… I hope. All I can do is wait. Have you worked it out yet? Who am I? Why am I here? What’s my job? Well if u guessed that I’m middle-aged man, dressed in all black, with a balaclava on my head, on top of a rooftop with a sniper gun next to me, then well done you are correct. The building that I’m in I must say is special; I picked it especially for this mission. The building is as grey as a black cat and quite tall.

I think that it was left abandoned or something, I don’t know. The windows are broken, the colour has faded into darkness and I believe that this is just perfect for me. The height is perfect because no one can possibly see me. The emptiness is magnificent so that there is absolutely no disturbance to my concentration. I chose the perfect day as well. Sunday. As you can guess the streets are like the building, lonely and abandoned. Ha, you could say that it’s just like me. Once again my friend hate creeps up. The building has a fire escape and that’s my exit out of here once my work here is done.

This place is opposite the place that I’m aiming for, the place where he will come into alive and when he comes out he will be dead. A smile comes on my face at the thought of this. I laugh. Ssshh, got to keep quiet, can’t let anyone notice my presence here. That place, the place where he will go to, is a swanky new restaurant. It looks so posh and better than this place I am laying in, but I never chose this place for looks. Wow, that restaurant has a huge window and I can see that inside there is a lot of bright colours. I think that it’s one of those gay, Italian restaurants, I don’t really know.

I see that there are people through the window but no… he isn’t there. They’re just normal, boring people, if only they knew what I had in store for them. I’m doing these people a favour, as well you know. I’m about to lighten up their lives or destroy it; lets just say that after today these people will not be the same again. Ha. The sky is blue. More blue than usual. I suppose it’s because I’m so high up. I never used to look at the sky. I mean really look up at the sky. I never knew that the sky was so pretty it calmed me down. Ahh little birds up there as well. Time is nearly up.

Wait, wait and wait. What’s this? A car approaches. I look at my watch, 12:15. He is late, making me wait here for fifteen extra minutes, the idiot! That doesn’t matter now, I mean he is going to be dead soon. Why not now do you ask? Why don’t I kill him now? I have to wait more I have to be patient. The car pulls over up against the kerb next to the restaurant. Just where I thought he’d park, excellent. Ooooo I see that he is driving his BMW X series today. It’s as black as his heart. The headlights turn off and I hear the engine die. Anyway I’ll tell you why I’m not going to kill him now.

It’s because I want him to die on a full stomach. Ha! I’m not crazy. He comes out of his car. He is quite tall and slim, dark haired and today he is wearing a dark blue suit, which matches his hair colour. And who’s that? Oh. It’s her; I never knew that she would be here. She is wearing her lovely pink dress today, the one with daisies on it. Her lovely brunette hair is shining like the sun. She is just lovely. They walk into the restaurant holding hands. Have fun. He better enjoy his last hour with her. Why am I doing this you ask? Well, first of all you ask too many questions, you’re giving me a headache.

I’m doing this for her and only her, not for me, for love. I love her. Much more than he loves her, much more. She used to be with me did you know that? Yeah about a year ago now we were together. We were going to get married, live in perfect harmony till he showed up. He ruined everything, he turned her against me, he stole her from me and he doesn’t even love me. My friend hate shows up again my eyes go red. Hate. It’s all my heart feels right now. Hate is my friend. I do not love anymore; I couldn’t even if I tried. The only person that I ever loved was her, but now he has poisons her against me!

My forehead is burning now. I stand up and grab my weapon fiercely. I go back on my belly, the roof floor is cold, I aim… all I have to now is wait. Wait for at least one more hour. Ha. An hour passes; my hands are gripped to my weapon. The time is up now. All the preparation has led to this one moment. Ha. They come out of the restaurant finally. How dare he hold her hand? How dare he. I see red again. Hate is my only friend. I see through the gun, I aim it on him, on his head. Should I? Yes, yes, yes I should. My finger is trembling on the trigger; all I have to do is pull… ha, ha, ha. I’m not mad. Pow, POW, pow.

My ears ache I never knew that a simple thing like this would be this loud. I stop. Four times. You may say that I was a bit harsh but he deserved it. I hear screams and I realise that my eyes are closed. I think it’s raining again, but how? The skies are still blue. I wipe my eyes. Ha. It’s over finally. I look down onto my masterpiece and I notice that a crowd has gathered. What a catastrophe, thanks to me. Ha. Oh wait, what’s that. No. No, this cannot be possible. Can it? Am I mad? Crap. There he is. Shit! He is alive and well. What’s going on? If he is alive then who is dead? Who is everyone crowding around?

Oh god no! It can’t be! What have I done? I’m scared to look but I have to, I have to know. It is isn’t it? It’s her! I killed her. I did, didn’t I? I killed the love of my life. What? How? I blame my friend hate. You blinded me, I couldn’t see. It was an accident I didn’t mean to… (Sob). I’m sorry. It’s raining heavily now but I look once more at the sky and it’s still as clear and blue as ever. Am I going mad? I asked you a question… answer me! It doesn’t matter anymore. Don’t worry about me. I know what I have to do now. How am I meant to live without her, without her my life has no meaning.

The only reason why I did all this is because I thought that it would get her and me back together, once he was gone, but he has not gone. She is gone. She is gone forever. I stand up slowly, wipe my eyes again and take a deep breath. I walk to the edge of the building and look down. It’s a long way down but like I said I can’t let a stupid thing like fear stop me. The edge seems friendlier now, more friendly then my friend hate. That’s all I can say now, it’s all that I can say, after all these years, all the hard work has led up to this. Trust me this is not how I wanted it to end.

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