My Autobiography

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The removal men had arrived to move all the packed up cases lying in cluster around the house, which were filled to the brim over spilling. I had spent the most of my younger years in that house, I could remember all the fun filled memories as well as the horrible ones I had in the past and I could see them all in my head, I could stand there all day reminding myself of all the happy times. Time had flown by so quickly and I couldn’t believe that it had all gone so rapidly.

It seemed like yesterday that the house was complete with the people that had cared about me the most, but right at this moment it just seemed like a blur a particular recollection of the past just like broken fragment of a vase that all the pieces had spread so far that some of them had got lost and there was no chance they were going to return. I stood alone in the centre of my living room, all I could remember was seeing a desolate house standing upon its weak foundations, the house was so silent that anyone could hear a pin drop.

With my eyes firmly shut I tried to remember all the things that happened to me in this very house. Some memories began to slowly unwind some good and other not well. Every room reminds me of a story, a story of my life changes and what was to happen in my future. As I approached the kitchen, I could see the vivid images of cooked food my mom used to bake. The fresh smell of bread baking and the mouth-watering curries she made were simply divine.

The enticing smell would fill my nostrils the tantalising aroma of the hot sweet scented food cooking would always make my taste buds have tingle sensation. In the very house I was standing in there were so many connections each room held a different memory a different story the different person I used to be, Moving on from somewhat everything would just make me forget my past that had happened, the girl I used to be.

I could vaguely remember my 15th birthday party the laughter and joy was hard to leave behind my mom was so entertaining and cheerful she would always pay attention to me, she was more like my guardian seraph I knew that no matter what happened she would always be there for me, but now standing in this desolate house with no one but myself, all I could feel was nothing but my stone cold heart, grief stricken, my feelings felt abandoned I couldn’t believe she left me without a goodbye, the thought of her not being there made me more angry and I could feel the anger and sorrow burning up inside me, so many unanswered question but no one to answers them, feeling so confused, neglected and desperate, I just wanted to feel loved again, the love that I had longed for that my mom could only give me but I knew even if I wished as hard as I could thing would always be the same.

If only time could stop and I could undo what happened. I made my way towards the door the removal men had finally packed everything up within a couple of hours they were leaving I made my way toward the entrance, tears dropped down my face but I quickly wiped them away. I sat in the car with my dad leaving the old house was the worst thing all the memories would stay locked up in that house forever my dad drove me off in the car I gave a look back at my house it stood there, empty and longing for the happiness and life it needed . I knew moving away to California would bring a big change to my life but guessing it was for the best a new change is what me and dad needed.

I could remember holding my moms hand when I was perched up next to her bed at the hospital ward a while back the way she looked at me so frail and weak, dying of cancer her last breath was the one thing I could never forget she held my hand if only she could hold onto me forever, her broken promises that she would always be there for me rewinded in my head. The word death constantly rattled down my ears, it made me shiver with fear. I guess I didn’t blame dad for wanting to move and start somewhere new. It was like he wanted to escape the fears of reality. He was wrong he could face the fact mom has passed away but I guess California was only the beginning to my new start.

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